- Never have to buy your own drinks.
- Can get laid any time you want.
- Don't look like a frog in a blender when you're dancing.
- Can get out of speeding tickets by crying.
- Not expected to know how cars work.
- Can sleep your own way to the top.
- Can scare bosses with mysterious gynaecological excuses.
- Don't worry about losing your hair.
- Always get to choose movies.
- Don't have to mow the lawn.
- PMS is a legal defence for murder.
- Don't have to understand the offside rule.
- Don't have to adjust your genitals constantly.
- Sweat is sexy on you.
- Never run out of excuses.
- Get expensive jewellery as gifts that you never have to take back.
- Get gifts all the time because men mess up so often.
- Can give the "look" that makes any man cower in the corner.
- Can always get a taxi to stop for you.
- Look good in shorts.
- Don't worry about being able to get it up.
- Have mastered civilized eating.
- Better at gossips.
- Look better naked than men.
- Don't have to pass the wind to amuse yourself.
- If you forget to shave, no one has to know.
- Can congratulate your teammate without ever touching her ass.
- Women do less time for violent crime.
- Can wear no underwear and be considered wild and sexy; a man without underwear is considered as disgusting.
- Short women are petite; short men are just short.
- Can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
- If you marry someone twenty years younger, you're aware that you look like an idiot.
- Don't need an excuse to be in a bad mood.
- A pointy-shaped vegetable is all you need for a good time.
- Chocolate can solve all your problems.
- Never regret piercings your ears.
- Can fully asses a person just by looking at their shoes.
- Can make comments about how stupid men are in their presence, because they aren't listening anyway.
- Piss sitting down, so it's easier to pass out on the toilet when drunk.
- Got off the Titanic first.
THE END
